Truly Alive
by Aleatoric
Summary: [One shot. Vincent x Tifa.] [It was the first time he truly noticed her.] She looked so relieved in that one instant that he almost forgot everything inside of him, all of his guilt and confusion. And he felt normal. Useful. Needed.


_Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, they belong to square

* * *

_

**……………**

**Alive.**

**…..………..**

He remembered that it was the first time he had really felt connected to her. Yes, her quiet beauty had always intrigued him, but beauty was all it was. To him, beauty alone could never be held of more than of a mild interest.

From the edge of the forest clearing, he picked out her milky form in the growing darkness. Ruby eyes illuminated by the warmth of the campfire, she stood with Aeris and Cloud, deep in conversation. He had predicted that their topic of discussion would be mundane, and distant as he was, he took little heed of the proceedings, and chose instead to be absorbed with his own thoughts. However, they seemed to have lost their clarity, a jumbled mess of emotions, voices, and a face that would never be buried, palpable and raw. Putting his thumb and fingers on his temples, he rubbed gently, willing his thoughts to regain order, but he accomplished nothing. It was a strangely quiet, yet passionate voice that cut through his internal torment.

"But isn't really living striving to be what nature isn't?"

He raised an eyebrow ever so slightly, interest piqued. Until now, Tifa had offered little; mainly listening to what the other two had to say.

He watched unseen as she continued, eyes glimmering, her delicate fist on her heart as her unsure voice gained confidence.

"We fight for the planet so we can live, and be with those we love…"

The glimmer in her eyes sparked a fire. A flame that he was drawn to like a foolish moth.

"…And in striving, we are truly alive."

He had never heard such simple lucid thought, that seemed so right, yet so different from himself. Now that she had mentioned it, it seemed obvious, but he could not find it in himself to overcome any more, to be any more daring, with his emotions.

"umm… but aren't we supposed to be saving the planet? Not going against nature?" It was Aeris' peaceful voice. Vincent frowned slightly at her lack of comprehension.

"By nature, I didn't mean mother nature… I meant…"

But Aeris would never hear what Tifa actually meant, as she was cut off by Cloud. Who had also clearly missed her point, and was less open to explanation than Aeris.

"Aren't you on the wrong side here Tifa?" The blonde smirked.

"Shouldn't you join the Shinra instead?"

Aeris giggled at Cloud's remark.

If Vincent had been more easy-going, he might have slapped his forehead. Instead, he ground his teeth, and his already lowered brow became a deep furrow. Cloud was an obtuse idiot.

He saw her whole body loose it's energy. The fire of her being that he had loved in an instant, was doused in icy water. She had bared her soul, and had been humiliated, by the people she thought the most of… the people she loved.

Her voice was once again quiet.

"I… oh look… the fire might go out soon… I'll go and look for some more dry wood."

She weakly gave her best fake smile, and then left them there, walking towards the woods. Vincent felt his raw heart ache. As she crossed the threshold into the forest, he grasped her arm. She looked up at him, wide-eyed shiny in surprise and shock. Glistening with the beginnings of tears.

"I…" _why is my throat so dry..? _He struggled to find the words he needed.

"…I understand."

She looked so relieved in that one instant, that he almost forgot everything inside of him, his confusion. And he felt normal. Useful. Needed.

"then… why do you distance yourself so? From yourself, from us, from life…?"

Her speech was shaking with emotion. He felt the need to protect her… she was so fragile. Pale and delicate.

He said nothing.

But she already knew the answer. She suspected that it was to avoid getting hurt. To avoid the pain. She felt like a hypocrite, as in truth, they were both emotional cowards.

"I…" Vincent started.

"_I want to let go. Let things pass me by. So that I can live again, without the pain. _

_I know that she is right, although…"_

She observed him in silence, waiting for an answer.

Finally, he offered -

"We must both find bravery in ourselves."

His tone was steely, yet in it she found more solace than she ever had before. He was right…

"Yes. We must both strive. And find it… to live." She pulled him into a soft embrace, which he stiffly returned.

It was then that he realised, he hadn't really felt alive in a long time.

_

* * *

_

_1st one-shot style piece… not sure if it really works or not… __I have had some ideas for a whilebut had to finish my A-levels, and I did my last one yesterday… so now I'm free! (mwah ha haa…) ahem. Anyway I would love you forever if you reviewed. x_


End file.
